Chef Miffed

Chef Geoff

I'm over this place. Like my previous penchant for all white clothing, sometimes it takes a while to recognize what used to sound good was just a bad idea. I include in that list attending law school, spending hundreds of dollars on pogs as a child, wearing a hemp necklace, and other clear errors I've made for long periods my life. It took a second time at Geoff's to realize that what I was convinced was a fantastic meal was in fact not.

Chef Geoff's menu is boring, to say the least. It's salads, sandwiches, pizzas, and simply grilled steaks and fishes. Something you'd expect for lunch, but at dinner prices. I've been both times and had the same salad, but the first time I wasn't paying. The second time, well lets say it cost a fortune for some iceberg and defrosted popcorn shrimp. I'm convinced that they literally went down to the CVS and got themselves a box of Long John Silver's frozen dinners to put on my salad. Prove me wrong, Geoff.

I've been at lunch and at dinner, and I have to say both times are bad times to go. At lunch, everything is crowded - after all, it does sound like a lunch menu, doesn't it? Expect the suit-and-ties to be taking up the table space. At dinner, the tie comes off and the collar is unbuttoned, and everyone is at the bar talking, doing the happy hour thing. Open tables galore, but good luck enjoying your company's conversation. The din from the bar is so loud, and the line for the bathroom so long, and the guests so drunk, that you're just waiting for "Get Low" to start playing and for someone to spill an inexplicably murky colored drink on your shirt.

Our entertainment for the evening was a bad haircut behind me and our waitress' crazy eye situation. One was smaller than the other, like significantly. Her pushyness was downright upsetting (especially since I was convinced the eye was staring at me the whole time). After asking if we had been there before (we had) she insisted on sharing her favorite dishes on the menu. She had many. All, in her words, were "refreshing."

At the end of our meal, my simple salad sat like a brick in my stomach. With so many other fantastic restaurants right by Federal Triangle (Central, Les Halles, Ten Penh, just to name a few), and Penn Quarter so nearby, there's absolutely no reason anyone should have to suffer Chef Geoff's.

-M.